2920

Today marks 8 years (2920 days) since the surgery that radically changed the course of my life.  As I sit in the dark of my bedroom writing this, before my house awakes, I can’t help but be mindful of what today means.  Through the last 8 years it has meant different things for me, but this year feels like its one of reflection. I remember the hours, days & weeks after surgery seemed to move slower than frozen molasses. Now it’s as if the days are on hyperdrive.  I had goals I had set for myself that have gone by the wayside and yet things I never imagined doing happened.  I’ve decided I need to revisit my list of goals and decide what’s still meaningful and get on it!!!

Not only am I reflective but I’m still so very THANKFUL! So many others dropped everything to be by my side or to help care for my babies. I can never say Thank You enough. I am so grateful!!!! Many others held me in prayers & well wishes. I received cards, balloons, and lots of messages of love, encouragement, and support.  Thank you!!!! It was & still is overwhelming to think of it all.  I am so very Thankful to have had such an incredible cheering section then & in the days, weeks, months & years that followed.

I wish I could update you and say that I am now at 100%, but I’m not.  I am not sure that’s my story and most days I am okay with that.  I am my biggest stumbling block!!! The deficits I still have are still real... yet I think if I am honest with myself, my perception of some of them is much worse than they truly are. I’m still learning that people don’t care about them as much as I do. I’m not saying people around me don’t care... it’s they aren’t bothered by them, they care for me regardless. I just have to get this idea & my fears about them under control & be willing to dance outside the boundaries occasionally. 

It’s really hard to believe it’s been 8 years! Time flies when your busy living life!

Thank you for being a part of my journey! I’m not done yet. Be Blessed.

Flu stinks

A glad heart makes a happy face; a broken heart crushes the spirit.

  --Proverbs 15:13, NLT

Last night at bedtime I asked a few of my friends & family to especially pray for Kadin as I was particularly worried about him.  To them I say : Thank you so much for all the prayers last night. We stayed out of the ER. Kadin woke up at 9:00 pm struggling to breathe, in his half sleep state convincing him he just needed to relax & take a couple of deep breaths was a challenge. Finally, he realized he had to go to the bathroom & after that he finally woke up enough that his breathing returned to normal. It was about a hour to go before we could do another breathing treatment, so I talked him through the importance of relaxing, deep breathing & not getting too worked up. I’ve been sleeping is his room on the floor since Sunday so he knows I am always near.  He drifted back off to sleep moments later with a cold cloth on his head to help with his low grade fever. I laid in my makeshift bed, preparing myself for the next few hours, praying God would intervene & give Kadin restful sleep. Another half hour of snoring occurred and again he sat up in a panic, tears streamed down his red hot cheeks and his eyes screamed fear. I gently kneeled before him & spoke in a calm voice (unlike me in a child medical situation- I am usually quite flustered). I reminded him again to relax & take in deep breaths & that I was there with him. A few seconds (felt like minutes) he rallied & calmed himself down. He blew his nose, had a drink of water & asked for another cool cloth. When I brought it back to him, he still looked scared... I asked if he wanted to pray, he said yes. So we prayed that God would come along side him, help him to rest, to be with him if he had another scary moment, to comfort his tired, weary, scared heart.  And he drifted back off to sleep. I fully expected him to wake up a half hour later & needing to do another breathing treatment but he didn’t.  He woke up a few times throughout the night & without me, he didn’t allow himself to get worked up but to calm down & take a couple of deep breaths.  Its now 6 am and I am writing this and he didn’t have a breathing treatment at all since the initial one before bed.  Are we out of the woods yet? No way! I’ve plans to call & visit the Doctor’s office today & we will see what they say. I’m confident he has the flu (starting day 3) just like Darren (starting day 7).  I’m thankful for some rest & I’m praying for continued healing for Kadin & Darren & that Zach and I don’t get it.

In fact Kadin just woke up (6:30 - eek) and gave me a thumbs up! He’s now back laying in bed resting.  Thank you again for your prayers. Keep them coming!!

Praising God for His goodness.

Blessings.