Here's Cameron's article below.
Blessings.
My
Cancer Journey as a Caregiver for My Wife
I
will never forget November 21, 2005. This was the date of my wife,
Heather's cancer diagnosis. She had malignant pleural mesothelioma,
a very rare and extremely deadly form of cancer. I became her
caregiver during this time, and I never expected to learn any of the
lessons that came with it. Just when we thought everything was
perfect for our family, things changed in an instant. Her diagnosis
came only three months after the birth of our first and only child,
Lily.
Becoming
a caregiver began right when I learned of Heather's illness. We went
to the doctor's office together. She had been feeling ill for many
weeks, but we had no idea that this was going to be the result. When
the doctor said mesothelioma, Heather simply froze. I didn't know
what to do either, but I wasn't going to let my wife's treatment
wait. As the doctor told me about our options, I knew the only way
that Heather was going to beat this thing was with someone who know
more about mesothelioma than anyone else. There was a specialist in
Boston named Dr. David Sugarbaker. I could only hope that this man
would be able to help Heather, as I turned to the doctor and told him
to get us to Boston.
After
her diagnosis, nothing was the same. Our plans for Lily’s first
Christmas went out the window, and we began focusing on helping
Heather heal. It was too difficult to be happy knowing that something
so violent was happening inside of Heather's body. I did the best
that I could on most days to help her. I was also working and taking
care of Lily. She was still a newborn. My fears overwhelmed me
thinking of what could happen to my family. I was afraid of losing
everything and becoming widowed and homeless with my daughter.
However, none of this was going to go away. I had to face what was
coming and be strong for Heather. Even though I had breakdowns and
moments of doubt, I knew I had to be strong for my family.
Help
could not have come any sooner. Family, friends and people we didn't
even know started to help us. I have never been able to fully thank
all of the people who reached out to us during this difficult time.
If someone offers to help, let them help you. This was one of the
greatest lessons that I had to learn. I couldn't take on everything
on my own, and had to let go of my stubborn pride. There were many
people out there who wanted to contribute to Heather getting well.
There's
nothing easy about being a caregiver for someone with cancer. A
caregiver experiences so many emotions at once while also showing
nothing on the outside but love and tenderness. For me, it was the
toughest challenge that I have had yet in my journey. In life, you
can walk away from a job or school, but when someone close to you is
hurting, when they reach out for help, no matter what you are
feeling, no matter how bad it gets, you have to be there. When I had
bad days filled with doubts and when things fell into havoc, I
sometimes found it hard to go on. I never gave up though, and that
is another important lesson. You don't give up on your family or the
hope that there will be a better day to come.
Those
were the darkest times, but even in that darkness, I remembered a
dream shared with my wife of holding our child together and raising
her as the good parents we all try to be. Heather has been through so
much. Her surgery, treatment and recovery have been shared with me.
She is the strongest woman I know, and in the end she was able to
defy the odds and beat this terrible disease. Today, over seven years
since her heartbreaking mesothelioma
diagnosis,
we have a happy, healthy family. Now, we hope that by sharing our
story of success over this terrible cancer, we can help inspire
others in their own battles today.
Please feel free to visit http://www.mesothelioma.com/heather/#.Uc9b1jvOkpg to see a video they have made in Heather's own words.
Thank you Heather & Cameron for sharing your story with me, I am truly touched.