Monday, January 05, 2015

Sunflowers



It's been a long while since my last post. I guess I haven't felt like I've had anything worthwhile to say. Sure thoughts & feelings have ruminated within me, but every time I go to jot it down, I'm struck with a complete blank slate. Not today though...

Have you ever had times in your life where you are forced to stop & evaluate where you are. No, I'm not talking about driving & getting lost... Although, the idea is the same. I'm talking about that point where you experience something and it causes you to physically stop, catch your breath, and evaluate what just happened. For some it maybe an accident or barely missed accident, surprising news (good or bad), or an unexpected moment.  Over the last almost five years, I have had this happen a few times. Usually, I'm left wondering why.  Let's see if I can catch you up... A few days ago as I was checking out Facebook, I read a good friends post and was suddenly struck with sad news.  I couldn't give it my full attention as friends were coming over for a quick visit.  After they left, I quickly jumped back on Facebook to see if what I had read was really true. I again confirmed the sad news and a wave of emotion came over me.  A young woman I knew, had died of CANCER.  Sarah and I went to high school together. She graduated the year before me. We had a common friend, Molly, so we were acquaintances.  A few months before, Molly had told me about Sarah's cancer and I've been praying for her since. I recently befriended her on Facebook so I could follow her & find out how she was doing.  I watched as she left state to receive treatments and I noted the big smile she posted on Facebook on a Christmas Day from a hospital bed. I remember her most for her smile!  In the last few days as family & friends have posted thoughts on her Facebook page, I was able to get to know her better. I learned about her love for The Lord, her husband, her young daughter, and her family & friends.  They commented on her spirit, strength, courage, faith, love & grace!  What a beautiful woman! I also learned of her love for sunflowers.  During her Celebration of Life Saturday, family & friends were encouraged to bring & lay sunflowers next to her urn. What a beautiful tribute!  I looked up the meaning & symbolism for sunflowers on Teleforal and found that sunflowers 'turn to follow the sun' (in Sarah's case, she turned to follow the SON).  I also read that their 'open faces symbolize the sun itself, conveying warmth & happiness' and from my understanding Sarah radiated joy and warmth no matter how bad it was. What a true loss!

You can't help but think about your own mortality when something like this happens.  As I watched Sarah's husband, daughter & family file into the front rows on the Church, I couldn't help but think how close Darren & my boys came to that.  I selfishly am thankful I'm still here. I believe God has a purpose in all things but sometimes is hard to understand... This is one of them.  Above all it reminded me of a few things: treasure those we have, tell others how you feel about them, live like it's your last day.

RIP Sarah - Cancer Sucks!!!!

Blessings.



2 comments:

  1. Sarah was an amazing women, wife, mother and friend! I miss her so much! I am so thankful that i didn't lose you Jess....

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  2. Hi Jessica! I received your Christmas card this week and can't believe how big your boys are! I was going to email you, but couldn't find your e-mail address. Would you mind sending me a quick email so that I have it again? childesj@ohsu.edu

    I'm glad to hear that you are doing well, but sorry to read about the loss of your friend.

    Jana

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